Who Gives A Shit Moment Of The Week!

The NFL released the 2011 team schedules yesterday, but do any of us really even give a shit? I know I fuckin don't! I have bigger fish to fry, rather than getting a fuckin hard-on about a locked-out league giving out the dates and times for their imaginary games! I think I might be more interested in girl's fuckin softball, than this shit! Seriously, where's Jenny "Pinch My" Finch when you need her? PMAC woke up on the wrong side of the bed this morning, and I have a feeling I'm not going to be so nice today. The bitch at the Dunkin Donuts window better be ready when I throw my change at her face, and rip up the receipt into a billion fuckin pieces, while pulling my prick all at the same time! What the fuck do I care?!?! I'm not the only guy who's fucked a Wake-Up Wrap! Here are some notable games that will most likely NOT be played:

The NFL will pretend to kick off the season on Thursday night 9/8, when the defending Super Bowl champion, Green Bay Packers, will host the New Orleans Saints at Lambeau Field.

Week 5 - New York Jets @ New England Patriots
Week 11 - Philadelphia Eagles @ New York Giants
Week 16 - Chicago Bears @ Green Bay Packers

Who Gives A Shit Moment Of The Week!

Woof! Woof! Woof!!! The Texas A & M Rosie O'Donnell Aggies defeated the pigs from South Bend last night, 76-70, to win the NCAA Women's National Title, and guess what, folks?!?! Nobody fuckin cares!!! Hit the showers, bitches, and don't forget to use soap this time!!! All of you have what I like to call the "Zactleys," which means your twats all smell exactly like Trey Wingo's two-hole!!! Wow! How disgusting is that!!! I rather suck off Pepe Le Fuckin Pew, than waste any more time on this fuckin trash! Where's Oscar the Grouch when you need him!?! Seriously, even that prick won't piss away precious seconds discussing these sports-bra-wearing-freaks!!! Sorry, losers, but PMAC Crack Fuckin Corn, and I don't care!!! I honestly rather hang out with that jerkoff from the Just For Men commercial who jumps out of his apartment window on to the roof of a moving box truck, then leaps off the truck into a fuckin convenience store just to buy some hair-coloring and milk, for himself and slut neighbor!!! Amazing! The guy has nothing in his refrigerator but an already open bottle of beer, and some fuckin mustard, and he's scared to open the door because his hair is gray?!?! How the fuck do you leave your house when the horny blonde neighbor is waiting for you at your front fuckin door!!!! You get your ass out there, and you bang that fuckin broad!!!!!