If any of you geniuses has the itch tonight, then Uncle PMAC will help you scratch it with two Fresh Nova-Scotia Thursday Night College Football LOX! The "U" welcomes the Virginia Cavaliers into Miami, and nobody loves the spotlight more than the 'Canes (-13.5), while Case Keenum and the Houston Cougars will be hosting the Rice Owls in a good old-fashioned Texas shootout, and I guarantee Houston (-27.5) will cover with ease. I'm not kidding, folks, this is like taking condoms from a pervert!!! You're insane if you don't bet the ranch on this matchup! Grow up, and grab your little beanbag for once! Folks, I promise you this is maybe the two biggest locks of the entire year tonight!!!!!!!! If I'm wrong, then I'll drop over my friend Cliff's house, and purposely forget my parachute! Enjoy!
MIAMI (-13.5) Vs. Virginia. The Prick Is Miami!
HOUSTON (-27.5) Vs. Rice. The Prick Is Houston!
