Morning Tush!

I  would stick a fuckin taser up my ass, if it meant I could have a half-hour with Jessenia "Don't Call Me Miami" Vice! I'm not kidding, folks, if her twat doesn't smell like tulips, then my name must be Harvey Fuckin Milk! All I can think about is dipping my french toast sticks in her round rump, which is filled to the brim with the sweetest maple syrup you've ever tasted. Jess actually cured my soar throat the other day when she suggested I gargle her clam juice, rather than the normal warm salt-water! What a sweetheart! I'll give this broad a Brazilian wax with my fuckin teeth! I want that twat nice and smooth! The Cabin will be home to Squirtamania tonight, once I get this bitch in between the sheets! Don't be shocked when I tell you guys tomorrow morning that my Tempur-Pedic turned into a cocksuckin water-bed overnight! I'll show up to the office with pussy on my fuckin sideburns! Who fuckin cares?!? I don't know how many times I have to repeat myself! I'm not the kind of guy you bring home to mom and dad!!! I'm a bad fuckin boy! I should sit in the fuckin corner with my hands tied behind my back! I'm probably the only prick on the planet who can wack off with a fuckin straight jacket on! Enough is enough!!! Sit on my face however long you want! I don't even care if you have to go potty, don't you dare move that fuckin tush!!!