Loser Du Jour!

I might need to retire, folks, because I just can't take this crap anymore. In the category of you can't make this fuckin shit up, American sprinter, Justin Gatlin, arrived at the world championships in South Korea with frostbite on both feet. What is this loser fuckin thinking about? The 2004 Olympic champion, who last year made his return to competition after serving a four-year doping ban, told the Associated Press Wednesday he got frostbite about two weeks ago after going into a cryogenic chamber with wet socks! Luckily, this prick didn't lose any toes and he'll still run in Daegu, but his wounds are not completely healed.

"You wake up at 9 o'clock in the morning in Orlando and it's already 90 degrees," said the 29-year-old Gatlin, who lives and trains in Florida. "So we're already hot, drenched with sweat. Get in the booth, socks were wet, socks froze to me instantly."

Thanks, genius!!! Who the fuck does this guy think he is?! Austin Fuckin Powers!?!?! Dr. Fuckin Evil!?! Hey, Justin, why don't you do us all a favor and freeze your fuckin babydick, so you don't make this same mistake again, you no-good loser, you! I rather have a threesome with Rocky & Fuckin Bullwinkle, than pull a stunt as stupid as this! So what exactly is it that you do, Uncle PMAC!?! That's my fuckin business!!!!! I'll rip Gatlin's fuckin toes off and sell them on the Home Shopping Network! I don't give a fuck, you can call me the cocksuckin chicken-teriyaki boy for all I care! I wear a nametag at work, and it says SUCK ME OFF! I yelled, "Get a room, you perverts!," out my suv window the other day at a random couple making out on a park bench! I don't care, folks! I might be a bigger loser than Justin Gatlin! When I see kids on skateboards, I yell out the window at them also! I simply say, "Go play sports, you losers!"