Loser Du Jour!

I truly believe that America would have a hard-pressed time trying to find a bigger loser than Marion "I Don't Have A Vagina" Jones! The disgraced ex-olympian, and former gold medal-winner, was cut last night by the WNBA's 1-14 Tulsa Shock! Wow!!!!! I didn't even know they waived players in the WNBA! I thought they just send you back to the locker room to suck on used tampons! I wipe my fuckin tush with sanitary napkins! I bet the fat bitch from Hairspray could even stay on that fuckin roster! Jones was averaging less than a point per game, folks!!! Unbelievable! I've had it with this liar! Who even cares about this fuckin phony anymore, anyway? Honestly? I'd send this dyke right back to prison, if it were up to me! Sit in your fuckin cell, and think about how poorly you played, Marion! Stop telling us you "fulfilled a dream," when the only reason you tried to play basketball was because you were blackballed from sprinting! I don't think I'd even hire this loser to be my live-in maid! I can't trust Jones to scrub the Cabin toilets, and wipe down the fuckin microwave! I would be setting myself up for failure! If you want something done right, then you have to do it yourself! Don't leave it up to some carpet-muching loser!!! Sayonara, you stale slice of pumpernickel!!! Now someone find me my fuckin boogie-board, before I flip the fuck out!!!!! I have to snap that velcro strap around my prick! High fuckin tide has almost arrived!