Helloooo friends, PMAC here, and I'm coming to you live from Prick Cabin where I've hooked up with my sister franchise, Butler Cabin, down at beautiful Augusta National. The 2011 Masters has begun! The azaleas are in full fuckin bloom, the water is a clear cerulean, the sun is shining, and the patrons are excited for what should be an excellent long weekend in the Peach State! How about our boy Jim Nantz? This prick calls the Final Four, and the next day he's calling The Masters, while beating off inside the Butler Cabin bathroom!!! Who the fuck does this guy think he is? Johnny Mnemonic?!?! I'll show you a tradition unlike any other! It's in my fuckin underpants!!! We currently have an early 5-way tie atop the leaderboard at -1, but plenty of big guns have yet to tee off, and that includes Rickie Fowler (9:24), Martin Kaymer (10:19), Lee Westwood (10:19), Ernie Els (10:30), Hunter Mahan (10:30), Tiger Woods (10:41), & Phil Mickelson (1:48PM). Stay tuned to Prick Cabin throughout the day for live updates from Augusta, and make sure you have plenty of oysters, because we're about to get really horny on a big fuckin Thursday!!!
