Breaking News: Nets & Nuggets Reach Tentative Agreement*

The New Jersey Nets and Denver Nuggets have agreed on the terms in a potential Carmelo Anthony deal, and are now simply waiting on the superstar small forward to give his ok, and sign an extension with the putrid, 17-40, Nets. Have fun playing in Newark, Carmelo!!! This is enough to make me fuckin sick!!! I'm about to leave the fuckin office to go on my lunch break, and I plan on robbing the cocksuckin deli! Gimme all your fuckin Boar's Head, and keep your fuckin mouths shut!!! I'll put your hand through the coldcuts slicer, and slap you in your fuckin face with a block of provolone! Knicks fans should all go fuck themselves, because they will never experience any other pleasure for as long as the dogshit franchise lives! Carmelo Anthony IS a New Jersey Net, and you heard it here first!