Morning Tush!

What can I say? I'm tired of waking up to snow every single fuckin morning of my life, so I figured I'd let Eva Angelina have some fun today. I wouldn't mind licking her skimboard, you know what I mean? I feel about as cool as a bowl of oatmeal right now, and it's making me sick to my fuckin stomach! Give me something new for once! How about a Belgian fuckin waffle for fuck's sake! The Cabin needs to take a trip to Costco soon, or else it might be Quaker fuckin Oats until my junk can fuck a thimble! Who can even think of breakfast at a time like this?! All I want is for Eva to hang ten on my joystick! Cheer me up, baby!!! Pour me a glass of some of that clam-flavored syrup! It's homemade right?!?!