Confessions Of A Prick!

I think I must introduce all of you to a new segment of our fuckin residence, and it's called Confessions Of A Prick!!! I know you guys think you know who I am, but you really have no fuckin clue! I repeat that I'm not a nice guy, even though I got sucked in on a Friday afternoon...Tis the second Friday of the month, and I decided to get my haircut (as Telemundo ruled every tv in sight), before I could contemplate passing my cocksuckin beauty parlor up!!!! Mi scuzzziiii, that's neither here, nor there, because I'm trying to convey my personality to the masses! I happened to be leaving the barber shop, when I saw the same prick who just finished before me, and to make a long story short, this fuckin prick's car was dead! He needed someone to jump his fuckin Kia! Honestly, folks? I couldn't have attempted to look the other way more than I did! I didn't want to help this fuckin prick! I don't give a shit if it was going to take 5 minutes or 3 hours!!!!! Next thing you know, I'm backing out, and this prick asks me to help him! He tells me he has the jumper cables and everything!!!!! So guess what? Like a loser prick, and a complete phony, I chose to help this cocksucker!!!!!!!! What a fuckin fruitcake I am! What a pig! What a jerkoff!!!!! I should've told him to stick the cables on his fuckin scrotum! Since when am I, Dr. House??!!!!!??? The fact of the matter is this, pricks, I'm ashamed of being a nice and normal prick!!! Enough is enough! Look in the cocksuckin mirror, PMAC!!!!!