Jim Thome Belts 600th Career Homer!

Good morning, friends, and welcome back to Prick Cabin! Uncle PMAC would like to extend a personal congratulatory message to one of the most underappreciated and underrated baseball players of all time - Jim "Come Over Here & Blow Me" Thome! The lefty-swinging slugger, who hails from Peoria, Illinois, became just the 8th player in MLB history to join the 600 Homer Club. At 40 years old, Thome becomes the oldest player to ever reach the milestone, but he did it the second-fastest in terms of career at-bats. I'd like for all of you to raise your Smirnoff Ices, and toast this country-strong power hitter, because he deserves it more than most. Thome is a real man, he takes his family to strip clubs, casinos, racetracks, and nightclubs! He's tired of the ice-cream parlors, mini-golf, and arcades! How about a little fuckin fun once in awhile! Enough of this riff-raff-splish-splash-I-was-taking-a-bath crap! Live a little! Uncle PMAC was busy all weekend up in Saratoga Springs, NY, and he's not feeling too hot today! Then again, what do you expect from a guy who uses his fuckin pocketsquare as a jizz rag! Gross!